5 Reasons Why You Are Happier With Lesser Friends
Have you realised that the older you get, the lesser people you can call friends? No, your Instagram and Facebook “friends” don’t count. In fact, how many of them do you actually talk to? Sure, you keep yourself updated with their lives by scrolling through your social feed and how Facebook constantly reminds you of their birthdays.
But you don’t need a lot friends in life, all you need is a few good friends – five to be exact. According to Dunbar’s Number, a research done by British anthropologist Dr. Robin Dunbar, he revealed that humans could likely only maintain social relationships with an average of 148 individuals due to the size of our brain’s neocortex.
He then followed up with another research called, Dunbar’s layers, in which the emotional closeness between individuals were taken into account. The closest layer has not more than 5 people, which are your closest friends. You meet up regularly, talk about personal stuff and have a strong, emotional connection.
Well, that explains why the series Friends, only had five friends! Gaining a best friend is no easy job, it takes more than 200 hours before you both become #BFFWORTHY!
In reality, you’ll actually be happier with lesser friends. Here’s why…
1. Bye, Drama
Let’s be honest, you’re getting too old to handle all these unnecessary drama. You really can’t be bothered with the whole he say, she say crap. The more people you allow to be in your close circle, the more ‘gossipy’ it becomes. Imagine getting stuck as the middle-person in the whole situation? Ain’t nobody got time for that.
2. You know who’s really there for you
After months (years if you are lucky), you are able to tell who is there for you, hands down! Friends who would go the distance for you, without expecting anything in return. When you’re broke AF, they’ve got your back when you hang out. But that sure doesn’t mean, you can take them for granted.
3. Just being yourselves
True that! You can just tell them anything at all without the fear of being judged. Being in a small circle, you’re most likely able to just be yourself and not feel pressured into doing anything you’re not comfortable with. Unlike being in a large group where you may be peer-pressured. Making you to be someone you’re not. Whereas, your close friends probably share the same interests as you. Oh yeah, lazying around doing nothing in each other’s place totally counts!
4. Space to grow
IRL people change and it’s good. It allows us to grow as an individual. However, adapting to changes may be hard for some. Not all friends are able to understand what you may be going through. But there are some, who are willing to take the time to understand and adapt to you changing. Be it your beliefs, perspective and even characters.They’re all for change, as long as you still value their friendship.
5. Able to focus your energy to people who appreciates you
Damn right! Why waste your feelings and energy on people who takes you for granted. Not only does it not make you feel good, but it’s also extremely toxic for your soul. Focus your energy instead on people who genuinely love and care for you. Life isn’t always easy but friends make things so much more bearable!