5 Sex Myths You Really Shouldn’t Still Believe in 2020
It’s 2020 and we’ve been exposed to everything from “Pen pineapple pen” to “How to Fold Your Cereal Box” hacks and still, you find people constantly misinformed about sex and sexual health. Not to mention the fact that, especially here in Asian countries, sex is taboo and not exactly dinner table friendly. It’s also possible that, with all the information out there, that you’re simply unsure of what’s right and wrong. And that’s okay – we’re all here to learn together. Here are some, very common misconceptions that you should know about.
MYTH: “You can’t get pregnant if you’re on your period.”
If your chosen form of contraceptive is through tracking your fertility, you might want to pay close attention. Contrary to popular belief, you can still get pregnant if you have sex while on your period. That’s right – even if the chances are very, very low, they aren’t completely zero.
This is because we need to take these two things into account: a) the length of your menstrual cycle and b) the livelihood of sperm. For most women, our menstrual cycles will last around 28 days. However, because our bodies are all different, you may experience a shorter cycle than your sister, cousin, aunt or mother. Not only that, but it is also possible to bleed when you ovulate (this is called “Ovulation spotting” and 3% of women experience this), causing you to think that you are bleeding, when in fact, you are actually at your most fertile. Couple a short cycle or a mistaken period with the fact that sperm can live inside a woman’s reproductive tract for up to 5 days, and BOOM – you could get pregnant if you engage in unprotected period sex.
So, to be on the safe side, ensure that you are using some form of contraception if you do decide to part the red sea.
MYTH: “If he pulls out in time, you’re safe.”
Another sex myth is that a woman cannot get pregnant unless a man ejaculates inside her while having sex. As a result of this myth, may believe that the ‘pull out method’ is good enough to avoid pregnancy. That’s very rarely the case. This is because men will produce what is known as ‘precum’ or ‘pre-ejaculation’ before they release the larger volume of semen. Despite this usually being very little in volume, it still contains sperm and can still enter the vagina, rendering pregnancy possible. In fact, according to Planned Parenthood, “for every 100 people who use the pull out method perfectly, 4 will get pregnant” but because it is not something that can be perfected easily (sometimes you just can’t see it coming), “in real life, about 22 out of 100 people who use withdrawal get pregnant every year — that’s about 1 in 5.”
MYTH: “You isn’t considered an orgasm if you didn’t experience it during penetration.”
Some of the most searched questions on the internet relating to orgasms are:
“How do I know if I’ve orgasmed?”
“Why can’t I orgasm during sex?”
“What does it mean if my girlfriend doesn’t orgasm during sex?”
Because of the way the media – movies, TV shows and the porn industry – has portrayed the female orgasm, we often misunderstand it. Not all women orgasm during sex, not all women squirt and not all women can experience 12 orgasms during one session. These unrealistic portrayals of the female orgasm has led to more and more people believing that if they do not orgasm during sex (penetrative), there is something wrong with them. That is far from the truth; there is no one-size-fits-all for orgasms. In fact, only about 20%-30% of women experience orgasm through intercourse alone. Most of the time, women find that the most effective way to orgasm is to include clitoral stimulation.
So don’t be shy to reach down and give yourself a little push over the edge and men, don’t make your women feel guilty about not being able to orgasm – it takes time and effort to know what works and what doesn’t. Give each other time and space to understand.
MYTH: “It isn’t ‘sex’ if it doesn’t go on for hours.”
Some people boast that they can keep going all through the night while some are embarrassed about admitting that it only took them 3 minutes the night before. Again – all thanks to what the media has shown us. The reality is – sex is sex no matter how long (or short) it lasts. Heck, it only takes sloths (who are.so.very.slow.) 5 seconds to finish their mating rituals (all that pent up frustration just trying to get to their mate?). Whether you prefer to take it slow and enjoy the pleasures and intimacy of the act or you want to get it done fast, that’s completely up to you and your partner. Longer sex definitely does not mean that the sex is better.
At the end of the day, it depends on who, where, when, why and how you have sex.
MYTH: “The bigger the 🍆 , the better.”
Ah, the age-old idea that penis size matters… When can we give this a rest, because, no – penis size doesn’t matter. If you’ve head the saying “It’s not the size of your boat, it’s the motion of your ocean” then you’ll know that there is truth to this. Size does not matter when it comes to durability or function as it does not affect its ability to give or receive pleasure. In the same way that some people prefer pineapple on their pizza while others don’t, size is a preference. In fact, the bigger, the more likely for you to experience injury, infection, pain when engaging in certain positions, tearing and so on.
After all, a bigger shlong does not mean they will last longer nor does it mean they’d know how to use it.
Also, just because…
NO, YOU CANNOT GET PREGNANT FROM:
- Floating semen in a pool or hot tub
- Oral sex (injecting sperm does not, in any way, allow for your egg to be fertilised)
- Semen that is outside the vagina but nearby (i.e. from the bed next to you, or on your tummy/face)
And there you have it! Everything and anything can be found on the internet – take the time to search it up. But even more importantly, take the time to fact check. Make sure you get your information from credible sources and more than one source because sometimes, even WebMD won’t cut it. To finish off (heh), always practice safe sex ya’ll!
*Cover image credits: Background: Photo by Cyrus Crossan on Unsplash Right, "The Body Electric": Photo by Michael Prewett on Unsplash